| | I'm not sure what triggers it exactly. But you go through the day unaware, until you realize. You are alone. At first it doesn't upset you. In fact, you enjoy the solitude. You enjoy the fact that nobody is bothering you. You like the peace, the quiet. But suddenly there is something that's tugging at your insides, begging you to seek companionship. A deep sort of ache. There's an overwhelming sadness, but you can't quite put your finger on it. Maybe its because you see everybody around you who seems to be happy. You don't want to intrude on their happiness. You feel that if you do, you will just ruin things for them. But inside, you are yelling, "Ask me what's wrong! Please listen to me. Just be there for me. Acknowledge me. Tell me I exist." But when you try to get their attention they don't even meet you in the eye. Their gaze just slips past your face, looking for something else that will satisfy their needs. You clearly do not. And you cannot bring yourself to yell out because once again you don't want to disturb their world of happiness. So you laugh at the appropriate time and act like nothing is wrong. But even when you're laughing a facade, nobody notices and you can't figure out why. Was it your fault that you've become a wallflower? You're sitting there crouched against a corner, wishing somebody would ask you why you're acting the way you are, why you aren't normal. But nobody does. Nobody pays attention. And the loneliness just won't go away. And you feel yourself drift away.
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| | Posted 10/7/2009 9:12 PM - 16 Views - 4 eProps - 2 comments
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