| | I can never sleep when I'm sick. After spending a sleepless night just thinking about stuff and sniffing, blowing, doing whatever I could to take the snot out of my nostrils, I came to a conclusion. A rather... Profound conclusion. Well... I guess its not that much of a shock. People have been telling me this, and I guess its been in the back of my head all along. I just never really addressed it.
I'm the most backward person ever when it comes to being a bitch. Realizing this however, probably won't make me change.
When most people are mean, they are mean towards those that they don't know. A rude person who accidentally bumps into them and shouts at them to watch their step. People in big cities seem to do this all the time to strangers.
"Hey asshole! You cut me off!"
"Shut the f*** up!"
Yes... Well congested highways tend to bring out the worst in people.
Just recently on an airplane, I was sitting next to a woman who was rather cranky. She didn't seem to have a problem acting rude towards the flight attendants.
The fact is, for most people its easier to be a bitch to people we don't get the time to know; people we won't ever see.
But the opposite holds true for me. I guess this could be the reason why most of my best friends think I'm the most moodiest person alive, and people who are just acquaintances think I'm actually the nicest person alive.
I'd once heard Christine say about me in Psychology last year:
"Mariam, I think you're a pretty patient person. You don't really push people to do anything."
But this isn't true. I do recall getting pissed on more than one occasion because somebody didn't do their part in the group project. And I do get impatient when we haven't left the house, when we should have five minutes ago.
I apologize when people bump into me.
I hand out gum when somebody asks me.
I smile to the other person to let them know I'm fine.
But the truth is, when a good friend bumps into me, I probably wouldn't even acknowledge it. I would blatantly refuse to give somebody I know very well chewing gum if they asked. I would burst into hysterics if somebody I knew asked if I was okay.
I just don't really understand why.
I guess it explains why I'm so mean to Iman (Sowwy Iman). I've known her all my life, and so when she gets on my nerves, I let her know in the loudest way possible.
I guess there's only one person whose an exception to this weird rule... I hope it doesn't change anytime soon though.
Hmmm... I think I cause more misery than happiness for those who are close to me. It shouldn't be this way... But it kind of is :|
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| | Posted 5/27/2009 7:09 PM - 20 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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